Done.
Finished.
The End.
No more.
That's good, right?
Of course it's good.
It's great.
Why wouldn't it be good?
It's really great.
So freaking great.
...SO freaking out...
Why though? It's just a book.
It's just my book.
It's just my first future-best-selling book.
And why not? Why the heck shouldn't I finish it tonight?
Why not just go and start the last chapter now?
I will be six pages closer in thirty minutes, if that.
But, no. Instead of sprinting for that seventeen-page finish line, I am here. Blogging.
Why? Because I don't know if I can handle being done.
If it's done, that means I print it.
If I print it that means I revise it.
If I revise it that means it's ready for publishers. For literary agents. For jacket design, blurbs, Kirkus reviews...and the closer it gets, the more real this is. So I'm going to lay low for a few hours. At least eight of them, I think. Or maybe another night. Just one night off from writing should do it. Or maybe I won't finish it. I don't even want to. I don't even care.
God, it's just like Senioritis. The relief. The giddiness. The chronic procrastination.
Oh my God, I wrote a novel.
Not that this is my first...but this is my first of publishable quality.
Oh my gawd, I want to ralph...
...And stand on top of the world and scream in victory!
Is this what it's like letting your first born go off to college? Kind of 'Freaking-Awesome with a side order of Holy-Shit'?
All I have to do is log off, grab my dark chocolate and type.
It will take me all of an half-an-hour before I'm a quarter of the way through the last chapter.
But what if it's not good enough?
What if it's drivel?
What if it's weak and full of plot holes that a six-year-old could pick out?
What if a monkey could have written it?
What if it's rejected?
What if it flops?
What if it doesn't?
What if it wins the Tassy Walden Award...again?
What if they publish it?
What if that stupid monkey tries to steal MY idea?
What if they want me to sign their copies?
What if another agent asks to see it before anyone else?
What if it wins the Newbery?
Excuse me, everyone.
I have a book to finish.
